What to Do When Your New Year Starts Off Wrong

The start of a new year often feels like a chance to hit refresh on life. But let’s be real—not every January begins with fireworks and fresh starts. Sometimes life throws curveballs instead, like the loss of a loved one, a career shakeup, or the end of a relationship. If you’re feeling like your year has started off wrong, you’re not alone—and there’s no “right way” to handle it. What you can do, though, is give yourself permission to take things one step at a time.

No matter what you’re dealing with, we want to make sure you don’t feel alone. Here’s how to cope with big life changes and set a foundation for healing when the year doesn’t begin as planned. 

How do I cope with loss at the start of the year?

If you’re grieving right now, it might feel like the world is urging you to “move on” because it’s a new year. But healing doesn’t work that way, and it’s okay to feel stuck, sad, or even angry. Here’s how you can be kind to yourself when coping with loss or seeking grief support: 

  1. Let Yourself Feel Everything
    Grief is messy. Some days might feel manageable, and others might knock you sideways. Allowing yourself to feel whatever comes up—without judgment—is a critical part of the healing process.
  2. Find Your Support System
    Grief doesn’t have to be a solo journey. Lean on the people who love you or join a grief support group. Talking with others who “get it” can make you feel less alone and offer new ways to process what you’re feeling.
  3. Create New Rituals
    Honoring what you’ve lost can be healing. Maybe it’s lighting a candle every evening or journaling about memories that bring you comfort. Small, meaningful acts can help you stay connected to what you cherish.
Man looking out window, reflecting after individual therapy, as he is coping with loss, starting the year wrong.

What can I do to manage expectations after a job change or divorce?

Major life transitions can leave you feeling overwhelmed, especially in a New Year, New You society that just feels forced. Whether you’re adjusting to a new role or navigating life after a breakup, setting realistic expectations can help you regain your balance.

  1. Start Small
    Big resolutions can feel impossible when life is already tough. Instead, focus on small, manageable goals—like updating your resume or exploring a hobby you’ve always wanted to try.
  2. Be Kind to Yourself
    It’s tempting to criticize yourself when things don’t go as planned, but self-compassion is key. Treat yourself like you would a close friend—acknowledge your efforts and give yourself grace when things are hard.
  3. Stick to a Routine
    When everything feels uncertain, routines can be a lifesaver. They don’t have to be rigid—just small daily habits like a morning walk, reading a few pages of a book, or making your favorite tea can bring some stability to your days.
Woman smelling the flowers, coping with starting the new year, practicing managing her expectations.

3 Tips to try again after starting the year off wrong

Not sure why the year just hasn’t started the way you hoped? That’s okay—you don’t have to have a reason for feeling low or like things are lacking that fresh, blank feel. Finding hope after a rocky start takes time, but it’s not out of reach. Here are three ways to jumpstart joy even when things didn’t start quite right:

  1. Start New Traditions
    Your life might look different now, but that doesn’t mean you can’t create something meaningful. Maybe it’s starting a weekly movie night, picking up a creative project, or finding a cause to volunteer for.
  2. Reflect on Your Strength
    When things are tough, it’s easy to overlook how resilient you are. Take a moment to recognize how far you’ve come—even if it’s just making it through the day.
  3. Reach Out
    Sometimes hope shows up in the connections we make with others. Whether it’s reconnecting with friends or joining a supportive community, relationships can remind us that brighter days are possible.

Setting goals and managing expectations this year 

Healing isn’t about checking off boxes, but it can be really helpful to have a list of places to start. Coping with loss and healing into the new year is a journey, and the steps will look different for everyone. Here are three ways you can keep tabs on your self-care with kindness as you navigate this. 

  1. Prioritize Your Well-Being
    Think of healing as a holistic process. Get enough sleep, eat foods that nourish you, and find moments of joy where you can—even if it’s just laughing at a funny video or spending time outside.
  2. Celebrate Small Wins
    Maybe you made it through a day without feeling overwhelmed or managed to call a friend after weeks of avoiding your phone. Those are victories, and they deserve recognition.
  3. Limit the Pressure of Resolutions
    Instead of a list of lofty goals, focus on one or two intentions. Maybe it’s practicing mindfulness or reconnecting with your creativity. These small, meaningful changes can have a big impact over time.
Woman smiling in nature coping with and healing from loss after experiencing individual therapy for grief support.

If you’re feeling stuck, individual therapy can be a game-changer. A therapist can help you make sense of your emotions, explore coping tools, and guide you through setting realistic goals for healing. It’s not about fixing everything at once—it’s about giving yourself the space to heal in a way that feels right for you.

Even if the year hasn’t started how you’d hoped, it doesn’t mean you’re destined to feel this way forever. Healing takes time, patience, and care, but it’s possible. And when you need extra support, Pure Health Center will always be here. We want you to know that no matter how your year begins, reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

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